Dan Bern: Tiger Woods

Lyrics:

I got big balls
Big ole balls
Big as grapefruits
Big as pumpkins
Yes sir, yes sir
And on my really good days
They swell to the size of small dogs
My balls are as big as small dogs

Well, it ain't braggin' if it's true
Yes sir, yes sir
It ain't braggin' if it's true
Mohammed Ali said that
Back when he was a young man
Back when he was Casius Clay
Before he fought too many fights
And left his brain inside the ring

Sometimes I wish I was Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods
Sometimes I wish I was Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods

I got a friend whose goal in life
Was to one day go down on Madonna
That's all he wanted
That was all
To one day go down on Madonna
And when my friend was thirty-four
He got his wish in Rome one night
He got to go down on Madonna
In Rome one night in some hotel
And ever since he's been depressed
'Cause life is shit from here on in
And all our friends just shake their heads
And say, "Too soon, too soon, too soon,
He went down on Madonna too soon
Too young, too young, too soon, too soon"

And it ain't braggin' if it's true
Yes sir, yes sir
It ain't braggin' if it's true
Mohammed Ali said that
Back when he was Casius Clay
Before he fought too many fights
And left his brain inside the ring

Sometimes I wish I was Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods
Sometimes I wish I was Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods

If certain girls don't look at you
It means that they like you a lot
If other girls don't look at you
It just means they're ignoring you
How can you know, how can you know?
Which is which, who's doing what?
I guess that you can ask 'em
Which one are you baby?
Do you like me or are you ignoring me?
Do you like me or are you ignoring me?
Do you like me or are you ignoring me?
And all you need to do that
Is one good pair of big balls
Balls as big as grapefruits
Balls as big as pumpkins
Balls as big as mine

But even though my balls are big
Sometimes i wish they were bigger
Even bigger
Big as the wheels on tractors
Big as the golden arches
Big as the Golden Gate Bridge
Big as the state of Kansas
Big as Mars and Jupiter
Big as the swing in Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods

Heather Nova: Fool For You

Lyrics:

You came into my life
I don't think that you meant to
You were standing in a doorway
I was trying to walk through
Like an angel or the devil
I could never quite say
It doesn't matter, anyway

Oh, Im' a fool for you
I'm a fool for you
Open my heart and let the wind blow through
'Cause I'm a fool for you

You can tell me anything and, honey, i'll believe
Cause when you keep me hanging, it only feeds the dream
I never gonna reach you, you're a distant shore
But you still got me coming back for more

Oh, i'm a fool for you
I'm a fool for you
Open my heart and let the wind blow through
Cause i'm a fool for you

Oh, let the wind blow
Through

And now the snow is falling
All the roads are gone
The earth is moving
But i'm moving on

I had so much to tell you
But no words to say
It doesn't matter, anyway

Oh, i'm a fool for you
I'm a fool for you
Open my heart and let the wind blow through
'Cause i'm a fool for you

Oh, i'm a fool for you
I'm still a fool for you
Open my heart and let the rain fall through
'Cause i'm a fool for you

Muse: Hoodoo

Lyrics:

Come into my life
Regress into a dream
We will hide
Build a new reality
Draw another picture
Of the life you could have had
Follow your instincts
And choose the other path

You should never be afraid
You're protected from trouble and pain
Why, Why is this a crisis in your eyes again

Taught to be
How did it come to be
Tied to a railroad
You'll have to set us free
Watch our souls fade away
Let our bodies crumble away
Don't be afraid

I will take the cold for you
And I've had recurring nightmares
That I was loved for who I am
And missed the opportunity
to be a better man

Joan Baez: Suzanne

Lyrics:

Suzzane takes you down
To a place by the river.
You can see the boats go by,
You could spend the night forever.
And you know that she's half crazy
And that's why you want to be there.
And she feeds you tea and oranges
That come all the way from China.
And just when you mean to tell her
That you have no love to give her,
She takes you in her arms
And she lets the river answer
That you've always been her lover.
And you want to travel with her,
And you want to travel blind.
And you think you'll maybe trust her
'Cause she's touched you,
And she's moved you,
And she's kind.

Jesus was a sailor
When he walked up the water.
He spent a long time watching
From a lonely wooden tower.
And when He knew for certain
Only drowning men could see Him,
He said, All men shall be sailors then,
Until the sea shall free them.
He Himself was broken
Long before the sky was open;
Forsaken, almost human,
He sank beneath your wisdom like a star.
And you want to travel with Him,
And you want to travel blind.
And you think you'll maybe trust Him
'Cause He's touched you
And He's moved you,
And He's kind.

Suzzane takes your hand,
And she leads you to the river.
She's wearing rags and feathers
From Salvation Army counters.
And the sun shines down in full
On our lady of the harbor.
And she shows you where to look
Beneath the garbage and the flowers.
There are heroes in the seaweed,
There are children in the morning.
And you want to travel with her,
And you want to travel blind.
And you think you'll maybe trust her
'Cause she's touched you,
And she's moved you,
And she's kind.

Anathema: Temporary Peace

Lyrics:

Deep inside the silence staring out upon the sea
The waves are washing over half forgotten memory
Deep within the moment laughter floats upon the breeze
Rising and falling dying down within me
And I swear I never knew, I never knew how it could be
And all this time all I had inside was what I couldn't see
I swear I never knew, I never knew how could be
All the waves are washing over all that hurts inside of me
Beyond this beautiful horizon lies a dream for you and I
This tranquil scene is still unbroken by the rumours in the sky
But there's a storm closing in voices crying on the wind
The serenade is growing colder breaks my soul that tries to sing
And there's so many many thoughts when I try to go to sleep
But with you I start to feel a sort of temporary peace
There's a drift in and out
Drift in and out
Drift